Come on! Since it is just you and us we can admit that we have all been there. Everyone, no matter how beautiful, witty or cute has at some point been dumped. He might have said he was going to call you next week but we all know you have been given the big E, the heave-ho, the ditcheroo. It is not pleasant but rise above it. Think Barack Obama’s inaugural address. To borrow from the US Presidential speech, you have just got to pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start all over again! Here is why and how.

1. The way to get over someone is to find someone.
Should you wait a decent interval to ‘grieve’ before venturing out on the dating scene? This is the really big question to which some people would answer yes, of course. Sarah and I say, NO. Don’t tell me that if some gorgeous Cristiano Ronaldo/George Clooney lookalike – or maybe even the real McCoy – rang you up tomorrow to ask you out that you would reply ‘I’d love to but (pause to sniff) I am still getting over Wayne’. Go girl, go. Or ring us – we’ll give you a pep talk.

2. Better to give than receive.
There is some truth in this old biblical saying. When you are suffering from low self-esteem it can really help make you feel better about yourself if you (a) find someone who is much worse off than you and (b) do something spontaneous for them. Offer to shop for the widow down the street, introduce a single friend to someone you think they might get on with. No, sorry to disappoint you about our motives, it’s not just about altruism. MAYBE said widow has an eligible single son who lives in Manhattan, who she might introduce you to when he visits next!

3. Say cheese.
Smile and all the world smiles with you. No one likes a misery guts. Buy some tissues and nominate one (tops 3) trusted girlfriend to confide in about your broken heart, but otherwise ZIP IT. Friends will avoid you after three weeks unless you appear positive, cheerful and unaffected by your newly single status. Strangely, an effective method of becoming positive, cheerful and unaffected by your newly single status is by being just that.

4. Follow a fire-engine.
Not as a friend of mine did once with me in tow because he was fascinated by fires (strictly in an observational capacity) but to check out the colour of the engine. I have a pal who swears by the therapeutic effect of having her nails painted bright crimson. But, if, like me, painted nails would not survive a morning without getting chipped, have a make-over or get your hair done instead. I attribute some really uplifting compliments I received at a recent do to the fact that Charles from my local hair salon transformed me from yeti to sleek Jennifer Garner wannabe in less time than an episode of the Apprentice.

5. Get a hobby.
Of course it will keep your mind off the RAT but more than this it’s a great way to meet new people. What’s more, even boring new people have friends, colleagues and relatives who might be worth getting to know. Not stamp or butterfly collecting, cricket or angling (you must stay awake!) but how about taking up a sport where the ratio of men to women is in your favour. So, golf, rowing or sailing are good options.

6. Acquire a useful skill.
Learn to cook. Better still, buy ‘The Dish’, have some fun and realise how you can win over all sorts of people through the power of the pan! Throw some dinner parties, drinks parties or long lunches. Get yourself out there and catch up with old friends. Then they’ll invite you back.

7. Buy a poop scoop and some small plastic bags.
It lifts your mood to know that you live in a friendly area. Working all week, you may not have even noticed who lives on your doorstep. Having a cute dog might break the ice with neighbours you have barely exchanged more than a mumbled pleasantry with. So, borrow a friend’s puppy – for a day if nothing else. But you don’t want to be caught on Google Street chucking dog poo on someone’s path. So be responsible. Whoever is doing this in my garden had better watch out.

8. Leg it.
Who says you can’t run away? It would be OTT to join the Foreign Legion or join Medicins sans Frontieres to get away from an emotional crisis. But, a change of scene in a suitable pampering or happening environment is great for recharging frayed batteries. Holiday time!

9. Hello Cadbury’s!
Don’t hold back. Instant happiness every time. Just make sure you are back on your feet in three weeks for obvious reasons.

10. Internet dating.
Come on, millions of people are doing it. This is the 21st century. You immediately access a limitless supply of people who might at last be more suitable for you than the slimeball ex who picked you up at the local boozer.

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